On the day of my daughters first birthday we had a doctors appointment to see the next little bean cooking inside me. We were excited to share the news with everyone at the birthday party a few days later. Unfortunately we didn't hear a heartbeat, the screen was shut off and we were handed a packet. Handed a freaking packet of articles, and options and resources like this was just normal, and then told to schedule a D and C as soon as possible because the stuff in my uterus could have been cancerous that my body was treating like a pregnancy. The tests and labs were run for a solid week after this. After a very scary week, and a blurry one at that, tests came back that it was just a mass of fibers. No cancer and no baby. It was this roller coaster of emotions. But I had a 1 year old and a husband who could not find a job because the recession was still going strong.
That day is clear, even 25 years later.
It was a Tuesday, the first day after Christmas break. I was in my bedroom listening to music when the commotion of my inconsolable mother, escorted by my brother, came up the back stairs to our house. I ran to meet them, and my brother simply said, "Dad's dead.
Since that day two short years ago, we have had the honor of listening to the stories of so many others. We have heard from people who know the pain of losing a loved one to suicide. We have heard stories from people battling depression, anxiety and addiction. We have people reaching out to us through social media and our website to find support groups, recommendations for counseling, and for an outlet to tell their story.
At Suffer Out Loud, we are BIG fans of the Crisis Text Line . This is a resource we promote frequently in our Suffer Out Loud community. According to their website, “The goal of any conversation is to get you to a calm, safe place. Sometimes that means providing you with a referral to further help, and sometimes it just means being there and listening. A conversation usually lasts anywhere from 15-45 minutes.”
A member of our Suffer Out Loud community recently checked in with the Crisis Text Line for some encouragement and wanted to share her experience.